The Root Cause & Hidden Dynamics in the ‘Blame Game’


We might think people lie for one obvious reason, to cover up the truth from others. But the Truth is, they lie to cover up the truth from themselves.

She had suffered sexual abuse from a perverted grandfather, who shrouded himself in the typical disguise of a church minister, for years.  Even before God goes the liar who speaks with the forked tongue.   In truth, he was incongruent in understanding his libido desires, that once split off, manifested as a sexual predator who pretended to carry the light while he projected the contents of his own shadow into those around him. Experienced liars cover their tracks by deliberately omitting certain highly relevant details when they retell their fabricated story to others, but audacity takes on another level when a human thinks they can fool God.

In addition to the devastating betrayal, not from a stranger, but from a close family member, she also knew in her very young years, that telling her mother the truth was not going to be received well.  Family members presented with such a shocking level of gross abuse by other relatives, often do three further devastating things to the innocent; they refuse to believe them, side with the perpetrator, and issue blame on the victim.  In lesser but equally destroying patterns of behaviour, it is common that the innocent one is blamed, sometimes by the whole family, while the aggressor is let off by those around them – but why?

The word ‘blame’, just one syllable away from flame, means to accuse someone for their being responsible for wrongdoing.  Third parties, bewildered in attempting to fathom truth from lies contribute to the pain of the innocent with levelling and dismissing statements along the lines of ‘you are both as bad as each other’, but this is to contribute tenfold to the suffering of the innocent, and is received in silent smirking delight by the aggressor, who from behind their ‘butter wouldn’t melt in their mouth’ fake image, secretly knows the cruel truth of their behaviour.

In programmed third-dimensional corrupt thinking, the regurgitation is that ‘there are two sides to every story’, but there are most definitely not.  There is the Truth, with a capital T, and people’s ability or inability to speak, or even perceive it.

In analysing why a mother would cut off the attachment bond with her child and maintain one with her depraved father, we need to look no further than the Electra Complex, in which we see some of women’s behaviour being fuelled by the savage desire to receive all of their father’s attention at any cost – even death.  Death in its literal term means separation.  In daily relationships between any gender, however, is the same dynamic, where one’s behaviour is being governed by a greater force.  The truth is being actively and consciously perverted by a thick layer of lies.  The innocent one is being separated out – ostracised by other women, and sometimes men, for the seething accusation of taking the male attention. 

Liars project out the part of their own shadow in their words and behaviour, that they do not want to acknowledge or own.  Thus, the refusal to bear the thought of one’s own perversions forces them deeper into their own shadow, and then all bets are off when that splitting of one’s persona connects with the collective shadow.

In my personal analytical view, in the pattern of where the innocent are blamed by the guilty, in every case I find the roots of that behaviour planted in a treacle of jealousy.  Fuelled by a single and relentless thought – that one is more loved than the other.